Sunday, October 14, 2012

The End of Him

I just miss him. I shouldn't. But I do. I miss him so much.
He left me when I needed him most and now my trust in humanity is at an all time low.
I hate the way things ended. To end things at all was going to break my heart, but the way you decided to end things shattered my heart, almost to no repair.
I gave him everything. I was always so good to him. I loved him with all my heart.
All I ever got back was...hurt. He cheated, lied, and never could support me emotionally. And yet I stayed, always. I had already fallen in love and I can't just let go...I can't give up when I still feel love for him.
Even now I still love him. Even though he called me a fucking psycho, just because I needed him when my world was falling apart and he didn't want to deal with it. Even though he said he didn't love me. Even when he said it wasn't real, anything he said to me. I have no choice now. I can't take any more blows from him.
He told me to leave him alone, and after everything that's been said and done, I just don't have the strength to fight for anymore. I've been worn down to the ground, nothing left.
I need time to rebuild.
When things get better for me, He's going to wish he had stuck around. Even if things don't get better, I know he will always regret how we ended and how he treated me. I know he will never find someone who will be as good to him or love him as much as I did.
But I refuse to be treated that way again, so him and I will never be together later on.
I deserve better.

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